Wednesday, August 15, 2018

Facts


I'm currently driving cross country again. Yesterday I went to a touristy gift shop outside of Mount Rushmore. They were selling this vest next to the rack of postcards. Nearby was a different rack with t-shirts about the NFL and not respecting our flag.



Also at the shop were other t-shirts of the same ilk. More Colin Kaepernick, Black Lives Matter, you know, all THAT stuff. 'Murica.

This was not a gift shop owned by the government. It was just one of the little souvenir places on the main drag in Keystone. I didn't think to check the name on the shop. I didn't take pictures of the other shirts. The sixth one pushed me over the edge and I got the fuck out of there so I could buy a damn postcard from one of the other half dozen souvenir shops on the block.

Later that day, I went to the Crazy Horse Memorial. There was a middle-aged hetero white couple in the museum, two partners on a road trip or a vacation or whatever, holding hands, wearing fishing hats.

The man's t-shirt read, "SOCIALISM IS FOR F*GS." It had a picture of Che Guevara painting his nails. It was most assuredly not irony.

These are facts. These are things I saw yesterday.

Frankly, I found the dude at Crazy Horse to be more disturbing than the store full of that shit. Here's why: he was fucking wearing it. He, or someone he knew, actively spent money to purchase a hateful, hurtful thing, and then wore it to a place of peace where literally thousands of people would see it. I've been moved to tears every time I visit the monument. This time I didn't cry about history or about resilience or triumph or some kind of forward movement or success or healing. But I did cry.

I don't even want to write about it. I don't want to analyze it. I just don't want to think about it anymore. But this is one of those things where, if I don't think about it, if I ignore it and go about my vacation business, I'm kind of culpable, aren't I?

So forgive me my poor writing, forgive the lack of eloquence or thought. These are just the facts that I'm seeing that I believe are worth knowing. And the things I do want people to know, from my own heart:
-this is not "harmless," as people say a lot with regards to a meme or Facebook. I get the feeling that a lot of people use that as an excuse. It's just the internet, it's just a comic, people are just being funny for the hell of it. But this is how it is. If it hadn't been a meme, it wouldn't be on a t-shirt. And if it hadn't been a real, stupid, hateful feeling, it wouldn't have been a meme. Now it is a hateful thing that is manifested in physical space.
-it is not funny. It is not funny to be cruel. It is not funny to be hateful. It's just that: cruel and hateful.
-it is not brave to state this opinion. What would be brave is if I put my Black Lives Matter bumper sticker on my car. Which I have not done, because I drive across the country frequently, and I am afraid to put it on there. I'm not afraid I'll offend someone. I'm afraid for my well-being.
-while I'm at it, something like a Black Lives Matter sticker is not the same. It's a fucking cry to be heard, and it's one that doesn't happen at the expense of others. We matter. Someone hear us. We matter.

Hatred is alive and well in America. People are selling it. People are buying it. These are facts.